“You are not required to suffer, just because you love someone.” – Bianca Janai
At one point in your life, you were consciously or subconsciously taught that love requires suffering. You were taught that a good relationship must go through some bad stuff first.
You were taught that you have to stick by someone’s side while they treat you wrong in order to eventually get them to appreciate you being there for them. You were taught that love comes with pain and love comes with suffering. You…were…taught…wrong.
The reason why I feel so strongly about this is because you receive what you believe. If you believe love requires suffering then every relationship you have will reflect that belief.
I’m not saying that you won’t go through hard times with someone you love. I am saying you are not required to suffer just because you love someone. Those are two different beliefs that can exist in the same space.
I need us to stop equating love with pain. I need us to stop correlating love with pain. They may exist in the same space on certain occasions but that doesn’t mean one is equivalent with the other.
Love requires exactly what 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 says. And I know what you’re saying to yourself, “well the Bible says love is long-suffering.” What if I told you you’ve misinterpreted that word?
The Greek interpretation of long suffering, which is the language the New Testament was written in, has nothing to do with suffering. Long suffering comes from two words, “long” and “tempered,” which means to be long-tempered, slow to wrath, and not easily angered.
God never told us love means suffering. God never said to stay in a dead-end relationship where disrespect and pain are ever present. God told us that love is patient. Love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Corinthians 13:4-8)